Monday, May 21, 2007

Tony Stark is a punk

Let me say something right up front: I used to be a huge fan of Iron Man.

What's not to love about an incredibly smart, successful - but otherwise completely average - guy with a bad ticker and a stalker's fondness for the bottle who somehow still manages to be a superhero? He was a like a drunk Bruce Wayne, fighting evil because it's the right thing to do, as well as an awesome way to pick up chicks.

Plus, no other comic gave you more "KRANG!" and "BLONG!" sound effects except maybe Thor, and if both characters were in the same issue you practically needed earplugs to read it.

As you can imagine, I was pretty unimpressed by what was done with the character during Civil War. Suddenly, Tony's not only a bit of an ass, he's completely amoral. A lot of that began with Iron Man and his Illuminati cronies shooting the Hulk into space "for the greater good," and quickly devolved from there. Now, Hulk's watched Gladiator like a million times and is coming back to Earth with a mad-on for pretty much everyone, but especially for the Illuminati and - you guessed it - Iron Man.

So Shellhead does the practical thing and suits up.

Whoa, wait a minute. What the hell is that? Let's take a closer look ...

Peek-a-boo, Spidey! Traded the "Iron Spider" suit for the black costume, huh? Yeah, good call.

So Iron Man, apparently aware he's about to get his metal ass welded to his face, decides to WRAP HIS ARMOR IN EVEN MORE ARMOR?!?

What a douche.

I used to love Iron Man, but I hope Hulk beats on him 'til he gets to the chewy Tony center.

Images from the upcoming World War Hulk #1


Lisa said...

Tony Stark is a punk... but I still wanna see the movie.

Maxo said...


Actually, I'm sorta interested in it, too. I'm a fan of Robert Downey, Jr., so I'm hoping he'll keep the character from being one-dimensional.

"... fan of Robert Downey, Jr. ..." And just like that, another secret shame is revealed.

Lisa said...

I bet you watched Alley Mcbeal just for him!

I saw a little video where someone snuck onto the set and caught a glimpse of the suit. Pretty snazzy! It is only one suit though, no suit inside a suit. Or a suit inside a suit inside a suit.