You should be reading: Black Metal Vol. 1

Why? Because ...


I'll have a full review soon, but for now I'll point you to the preview and say that if you've ever loved comics, throwing the goat or felt out of place as a kid, you'll dig Black Metal.

W.T.F. Wednesday: It's as good as grabbed!

Y'know, World War II might've had the Greatest Generation, pterodactyls and giant gorillas, but do you know what it really needed? How about a team of acrobatic brothers who used questionable language while dodging angry dinosaurs?

Click for big top size

Aaah - that's better!

Panels from Showcase Presents: The War That Time Forgot
Originally published as "The Circus of Monsters!" in Star Spangled War Stories #99
Robert Kanigher, writer; Ross Andru, penciller; Mike Esposito, inker

Superhero?: Doubling your pleasure

SPOILER!

This post contains details from the third episode
of Who Wants To Be A Superhero?

Not to be a jerk or anything, but ... FINALLY!

The third episode of Who Wants To Be A Superhero saw this season's first double-elimination, and it couldn't have been more deserved. After receiving a challenge from new supervillain Dr. Dark, the heroes had to split into teams of two at an amusement park, with one teammate riding a roller coaster to spot markers and the other running around looking for the numbers that will help unlock a door hiding the gleefully evil bad guy.

Everyone performed much as they had in past episodes, with certain heroes stepping up to the challenge while others slipped. Of course, I'm talking about Mr. Mitzvah and Ms. Limelight.

First, Mitzvah twists something and hurts his leg, and while he struggled through it he also made excuses and kvetched about it the whole time. And then Ms. Limelight got lost, got flustered, and then got even MORE LOST! This isn't to say that all of the heroes didn't make some boneheaded moves, but after the poor showing by these two in the past - well, it didn't look good.

Back at the lair, the heroes had to write up case reports and critique their own - and their colleagues' - performance. This was a little bit of a surprise because it seemed like something other reality shows would do to force conflict in the group (which this was, really), but at least it was all anonymous so it injected tension without it becoming about personalities. Of course, it didn't help that Dr. Dark left a note implying that one of the heroes might be a mole working for him. Dun dun DUN!!!

It wasn't true, and the heroes should have realized that the bad guy might, y'know, lie to them, but it did lead to them first talking about Mr. Mitzvah behind his back (shame!), and then confronting him directly. As usual, he was evasive and then combative, a combination that's been hurting him from the beginning.

Finally, it was on to the eliminations, with Mitzvah and Ms. Limelight on the red blocks once again. Do you realize they'd been in the bottom three in every episode? It's amazing they made it this far, but the ride was over for Mr. Mitzvah, who was eliminated. But wait! As the heroes begin to trudge back downstairs, Lee calls them back and puts Basura and Ms. Limelight back on the chopping blocks, and adds Hyper-Strike to make it three. After a little lecturing, Lee then told Ms. Limelight to hit the bricks because she was also eliminated! Ooh, a rare double-header!

And then everyone started crying. Seriously.

One more thing: Whip-Snap a sidekick? My ass! A little more confidence and she'll be a tough contender.

Current favorites: Whip-Snap, The Defuser, Basura

Friday Night Fights: What crackin', Kraken?

As most people know by now, Dark Horse has relaunched Dark Horse Presents, the anthology title that helped give the publisher its start, as well as giving some of its most iconic characters and titles a place to grow. This time around, Dark Horse Presents is being offered free online with a collection of mostly done-in-one stories. A pleasant surprise was how much quality the publisher seems to plan on just giving away every month.

The one getting all the attention of course is Joss Whedon and Fabio Moon's Sugarshock (which is almost annoyingly excellent), but one of my favorite stories this month was Gerard Way and Gabriel Ba's The Umbrella Academy: Safe & Sound. When I heard the guy from the band My Chemical Romance was writing a comic my eyes actually rolled back so far I could see behind myself. But then I picked up the issue released during Free Comic Book Day and - once you get past the unnecessarily emo cover - it's really pretty good. The story in the inaugural DHP confirmed it; I mean, it's got a hero named The Kraken punching a gypsy. Hard.

Panel from Dark Horse Presents #1 (online)

He hit her so hard her crystal ball dropped!

Bahlactus has seen your future, and it is pain.

EXTRA! EXTRA!

And here's a little bonus brutality, because pictures of Popeye punching an ape never get old.



As long as you're here, why don't you see what else is shaking at GCP?

And Now, This Message

Earlier today my wife and I got on a plane in Austin, Texas, and a few hours later we were in Taos, N.M., where we'll be for the next five days. I'm going to do my best to avoid it, but posting might be even spottier than usual until I get back to home base.

In the meantime, let's keep in mind what travelin' man Oliver Queen has to say about hitting the road.


You just know Ollie has a "Gas, Grass or Ass" bumper sticker on that truck.

W.T.F. Wednesday: Shell Shock

Reading through The War That Time Forgot, you sometimes come across something that really doesn't need any further explanation: A panel showing a couple of World War II soldiers making their escape from a sinking island IN A GIANT EGG SHELL is one of them.

Click for extra-large

Panels from Showcase Presents: The War That Time Forgot
Originally published as "Mission X!" in Star Spangled War Stories #96
Robert Kanigher, writer; Ross Andru, penciller; Mike Esposito, inker

The Pull List: 8-8-07

This seems to be one of those times when it can either be a small week for the pull list, or it can be a little more respectably sized if I decide to give in to temptation. Yeah, I think we all know how this is going to end up - to the list!

BPRD : Killing Ground #1: This latest BPRD series picks up where the last mini, Garden of Souls, left off, which is fairly exciting since Garden was pretty kick-ass. Creator and writer Mike Mignola can seemingly do no wrong - especially when it comes to his Hellboy universe - and I'm looking forward to seeing where he and co-writer John Arcudi go with the snappy momentum they built up with the last storyline. The potential for new directions has been mapped out, new characters have been introduced, and the artwork by Guy Davis lends a nicely organic feel to the whole thing. If for some insane reason you haven't been reading BPRD, now would be a good time to get on board with what is consistently one of the best titles out there.


The Rest ...

Daredevil #99

Green Lantern #22


Maybe ...

Avengers Classic #3: This wasn't originally on the list, but a retelling of the Hulk's first fight with the Avengers? I'm not even sure it should be a "maybe."

Black Adam: The Dark Age #1 (of 8): Honestly, I'm a little burned out on Black Adam. The idea of a depowered Teth-Adam trying to resurrect his murdered wife Isis is interesting (even if it was already done with Ralph and Sue in 52), but I'm worried it's a concept that will be dropped early in this eight-part mini series. I'm willing to bet Adam will get powered up pretty quick, and nobody needs a repeat of World War III. Check out a preview and see what you think.

Black Metal Vol. 1: I've been hearing good things about it, and the preview is awesome. It looks like it will deliver on all those promises made by the heavy metal album covers I grew up with, and I'm fairly sure it will lead to me throwing the goat with obnoxious frequency. Everybody wins!

Un-Men #1: Looks cool, but I'll probably wait. It's a concept that could either come off great, or really, really blow.


On The Block ...

Criminal #8: I know this is widely regarded as one of the better titles on the shelves right now (and it is very solid on all counts), but I'm wondering if this might work better in trade. Would that be the way to go, or should I be patient and stick with the monthly?

Marvel: Redefining 'essential'

Really, Marvel? Essential Dazzler Vol. 1? Seriously?

Friday Night Fights: Punch!

Digging around in the Post's morgue, I came across a little series full of strangely chatty villains, bizarre accents, and excessive exclamations not seen since the heyday of Chris Claremont's run on the X-Men. Of course, no one can out-Claremont Claremont, so I present to you that X-Men-lite group from across the pond, Excalibur.

And who are the first bad-guys Excalibur goes up against? A gang of silvery "warwolves" who, inexplicably, speak with heavy British accents inspired by Mary Poppins. Eventually the heroes catch up to them, and Captain Britain punches one in the face so hard that he ends up smacking his pancreas.


What'd you think of that, Unreasonably Excited Kid?

Panels from Excalibur #2

Lucky for us, Bahlactus keeps it cool.

And while you're here, why don't you see what else is on the menu?

Superhero?: More Bee Sting, less Mindset

SPOILER!

This post contains details on the second episode
of Who Wants To Be A Superhero?

Man, can I call 'em or what? OK, maybe not so much, so let's say goodbye to Mindset, who pretty much a-holed himself right out of Who Wants To Be A Superhero? this week.

Caught in a supervillain trap so perfectly out of the Silver Age that it made me cackle, Mindset decided it was smart to either a) stay in character or, b) be a complete douche. Probably not the best idea, since the heroes were split up and stuck in two clear plastic boxes with a growing number of bees, forced to compete in a spelling bee administered by - who else - Bee Sting.

(Quick aside: How perfect was Bee Sting? Totally perfect. I demand more Bee Sting!)

So, every time a word was misspelled, Bee Sting would release more bees into the boxes (I remember hearing "Ten zousand bees!" at one point), and since they were all words with "be" somewhere in the word the heroes had to purposely misspell the words to include "bee." Makes sense, right?

It made sense to everyone except Mindset, apparently. After they figured out Bee Stings' game, Mindset still insisted on spelling a word without the extra "e," causing more bees to enter their box; his team eventually lost and Bee Sting even taunted them by saying they "might've duhn better if not for zeh bahld one." Ouch! Speaking of ouch, the heroes were actually being stung, something Stan Lee brought up later during the elimination process.

Which is where Mindset really blew it. Rather than apologize, or even acknowledge that he didn't really have his teams' best interests in mind, his swollen ego led him to keep saying, "I don't think I made a mistake - I did the right thing. I serve truth."

Oh, and earlier he made Ms. Limelight cry, which was a little unnecessary but not unforgivable.

Based on his backstory and the overall look of his character, I thought Mindset had a chance. Now, I'm actually happy to see him go.


Current favorites: The Defuser, Whip-Snap, Basura

W.T.F. Wednesday: And Then They Made The Biggest Pie You Ever Saw

I bet you thought I was kidding about the giant coconuts, didn't you?

In part two of The Sub-Crusher, the crew of the Little PT Boat That Could manage to get away from the Crusher, but find even more trouble down-river. Apparently, EVERYTHING was big back in prehistoric times, and that ain't braggin' - check out the size of these coconuts!

Click to ape-size

Luckily, the boys know how to handle their cannons, and soon enough ...



Panels from Showcase Presents: The War That Time Forgot
Originally published as "The Sub-Crusher!" in Star Spangled War Stories #97
Robert Kanigher, writer; Ross Andru, penciller; Mike Esposito, inker

The Pull List: 8-1-07

It might look like a heavy week for the superhero camp, but if you've got a little extra cash you've been wondering what to do with, you can either send it to me, or you could get yourself a nice little mix of comics. Ah hell, go ahead - get the comics (I'll just take an IOU).

To the list!

Metal Men #1 (of 8): I'm going to say something that'll probably earn scorn from fellow comic nerds, but I was never really that into the Metal Men until they showed up in 52. In that title, the Metal Men (and their creator, Doc Magnus) provided a lot of the wacky fun and Silver Age-style concepts that kept me interested week after week. Hopefully that will carry over in this mini-series, because I love the idea of a group of sentient robots being led by a bipolar inventor in a fight against science-crime. Jeez, it almost sells itself! And the crazy, almost Deco-style art gives me hope that the writing will be in the same spirit. Check it out in this preview.

Thor #2: A lot of people complained that the first issue of Thor was too slow, apparently being too short of "thees," "thines" and flying Mjolnirs to satisfy. For my part, though, I thought the issue did was it was supposed to, namely reintroduce a well-known character who was supposed to be dead. Believe me, that's the kind of thing I want comic creators to take their time with. Besides, it did a nice job of setting the stage for issue #2, which I'm betting will crank up the Thunder God aspects a little more. I'm looking forward to seeing how the return of Thor plays out, and I appreciate the avoidance of oh-so-convenient shortcuts. Too slow? I say thee nay!

The Rest ...

Justice Society of America #8

World War Hulk #3

Conan and The Midnight God #5


Maybe ...

Killing Pickman #1: Tortured cop with plans to kill a literally monstrous child-murderer? Man, I love this small revival of horror comics that seems to be happening.

Alive Vol. 1: An unknown virus is making people commit suicide, becoming a pandemic in less than a week and leaving a handful of Tokyo teens wondering why everyone else died, and why they survived. Japan, you scare me - but in a good way.


Recommended ...

Elephantmen Vol. 1: Wounded Animals (hard cover): Beautiful art, solid sci-fi storytelling.

Gutsville #1 (new printing): Be sure to pick this inventive little title if you missed it the first time; now, where the hell is issue #2 already?

Whiteout: Definitive Edition: A perfect crime-noir tale in a unique setting and with a strong female as the lead character (always nice to see). This is what made me a die-hard Greg Rucka fan, and I honestly think it's a book everyone should read. You can even start with a preview!